2004-02-23 - 1:28 a.m.
No, I'm not dead. Not quite dead, anyway. I'm still more or less alive, though often somewhat depleted of late. It's probably a good thing I haven't coughed up and tossed any hard-earned simoleans Diarylandward, given the appalling rarity of my posts of late. All of you, trembling in your desk-chairs, clutching your mouse in desperation as you surf ol' Mirabile Visu in your vain search for clever anecdotes, links to stupid websites, and further evidence of my incipient dorkship, all of you remember a happier time, a Mirabile Visu golden age when style-sheets were a twinkle in me webby eye and posts were daily. Alas and fearful alack.But lookee! Robert's your uncle, Fanny's your auntie -- I've gone and web-muttered once more. Evidence that I still live! You must all be so thrilled.
It's a wonder, but despite my recent protracted silences, people still visit this site on a regular basis. Sure, many of them are Googling all manner of godawful things that I have seen fit in my carelessness to discuss here, and are stumbling upon my poor site, thrilled beyond measure that their persistence in clicking through thirtyodd Googly pages of their against-all-odds hunt for "goats with enormous testicles" or "dirty sex with Flemish merchants" or "musing of a goan blog" has at last paid off only to discover that I am the sort of smarmy bugger who mentions these things and then just drones on about the movies he's watched lately. But they visit still, and for that they are favoured, and one day when I rule the world their deaths will be swift and painless.
I promise I shall rejoin the living soon enough. Really. Until then, keep Googling me for the endless pornographic nonsense, and if you should happen to see me wandering with my arms hung out before me, jiggin' zombielike, giving y'all that bodysnatchers shriek that so pleases the laydeeeez, high-five me for Christ's sake or just buy me a beer. What's with you people?
